I was going to post this poem during the holidays in December. But, instead I left this for a later date due to the sadness and depressing tone about love/lack of love. This poem is not only about love it is also about human nature, the let down of living life as a spirit in a human body, being rejected, not heard, not seen, trying, making efforts, ending up tired, worn out, lost hope, hopeless, rebuilding hope in a world that may want to do otherwise for you. Dollyspeaks encouraged me to post it on my blog so here it is!
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Guillotine Heart
12-19-2008
The cold tall metal and wood guillotine,
The smell of the blade,
The stench,
You can almost taste it on your throat,
Dripping down,
Dripping down my throat,
As I choke,
Near the guillotine,
I am threatened,
By the man,
Who towers over you,
Who holds his hands around your neck,
Tyrant,
Coward,
Imbecile,
The mud squishes beneath my feet,
As I gaze up at this monstrous torture device,
Really I am gazing inward,
At my heart,
At the man who built the guillotine over my heart,
The man whose black leather gloves,
Make a peculiar noise,
As he rubs them together,
And the way the rain hits my face,
As I stare at the guillotine,
The cry of my soul,
To not be raped,
To not be assaulted,
To not be hurt,
To not be silenced,
To not be subjected to torture by the world,
To not be silenced,
To not be heard,
As I gaze,
My tears and the rain blend,
I can stand no more,
As my tears become like a river,
My body convulses,
As I fall to the ground,
I collapse in the mud on my knees,
Guillotine heart,
Silent,
Not seen,
Mud of my clothes,
I tell the man to go away,
I tell him to leave,
So I can dismantle the guillotine that is inside my heart.
12 voices speak:
I'm really, truly glad you posted this. I know it is deeply personal to you, but I think it's important for others to see it. Because when we talk about privilege and power, things can get theoretical and detached and unreal. Poetry reveals the human emotion and the profundity of our actions. Your poetry commands attention to issues of humanity--where we feel marginalized and frightened and uncertain. People with power try to strip us naked and instill fear in us. They try to deprive us of our humanity to make up for their own insecurities and inner holes.
But I think it is the tears in this poem that are most important. Because our tears are a symbol of our humanity, and even when we are raped, tortured, even if our mouths and eyes are stitched shut, we still cry. And that river of tears represents that NO ONE can ever take away our humanity, no matter how vicious and violent they are. I believe there is something untouchable within each of us and that we hold the key to it. And that's what I took away from this poem... we dismantle the guillotine. We free ourselves. Power will eventually only corrupt and destroy the person who abuses it.
This is a sad poem and it does speak to the depths of our sadness. But I also see a glimmer of hope in it as well, potential for change and liberation. But that may be because I'm always looking to see the light at the end of the tunnel when we're talking about the sadness of the world. ;) I'm really glad you posted this, Cec! You have a beautiful, magnificent, valuable voice!
Dollyspeaks - Yes my poetry does draw attention to where we feel marginalized, frightened and uncertain. That is the exact goal of people in so called "power" is to tear you down and make you feel less than. It is really not power but abuse, control and fear. As a human race we are still running of off everyone being persecuted against. People have been persecuting each other since the beginning of time. For instance, just because a torture chamber is dismantled does not mean the mental and emotional torture does not exist. Plus torture, not chambers like there were Europe, still exist. We have to end the persecution energy overall. Otherwise we will never break this pattern and violence, control, abuse, power and fear will continue to exist.
Exactly we are responsible to dismantle the guillotine within us. This is why Gandhi had it right in regards to being the change we wish to see in the world.
Thanks for reading Dolly and also thank you for your positive words. :D
Hmm.
I liked it. I am surfing now and trying to get the positive side of everything out. Even if that means, I, am labled as a "crab." Hopefully we can learn form one another.
Jay
Jason - I am glad that you liked it!
This poem strongly reminds me of your memories of facing colonizers (and sometimes being the colonizer) in your previous life. It seems like such a healthy thing to write out in poem form. (You don't have to post this, if you don't want to get into reincarnation on the site...)
Julie - I was actually thinking about posting a "discussion post" where we would talk about past lives and reincarnation. So it is interesting that you mention this in your comment.
It is something I believe in and to me I know is real. This poem covers multiple lifetimes. Medieval, Renaissance, Colonized lifetimes and being the colonizer. I know all of these lifetimes were real. Even if these past lives are memories of my ancestors in my DNA it is all valid and real to me!
powerful.
This is a magnificent write. If it weren't for the God creating love I would be lost with a damanged & broken heart. Bacause love is the greatest force in the universe I live and shall love again! Peace!!
eagles - Thank you! Yes love is the greatest force in the Universe, it is so great, so powerful and the greatest healer!
My eyes feel like lead and I must bow to their demands and seek rest but will review more intensely your u tube site and thanks for viewing mine. May Truth, Justice, Love, and Peace never cease from this earth!!!
eagles - Yeah I am glad you checked out my blog!
The earth and we are one and when we bleed mother earth heals us. Thank you for depth. Peace!!!
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